Becoming a parent is a great honor.
It is not for the faint hearted.
It is easy to have a child but not easy to raise one.
I can distinctly remember going through the premarital meetings with the reverend who married my husband and I.
One of the questions was whether we would be procreating and if we wanted that to be added to the prayers during the service. I did wholeheartedly agree with the prayer being included.
To this day, my husband says that it was my idea to have children when we are faced with parenting issues.
I say that there is no manual, and it is something that should be obvious. Each child is an individual who has different needs, attributes and characteristics. While some general principles can guide parents to care for their children, tailoring the approach to raising children is essential.
I was drawn to write about this topic because I had to face the fact that my daughters were different. I need to learn how to take care of them as individuals.
Becoming a parent is a learning process as I was reminded in church recently and this summer has been rife with lessons.
I needed to confront my biases regarding my upbringing and how I was raising my children. How times are different from when I was younger and I would have to adapt to the new world my girls are confronting,
The one area that took me by surprise was the mental health issues my girls have, which were compounded by puberty. It has been interesting to find my footing this summer. Get the girls evaluated and try to set them up with therapy.
I am happy that I took the initiative to start talking with a family counselor through our church, who helped me figure out that there were maladaptive behaviors and practices that I was able to work on overcoming.
This endeavor with Rebekah has helped us to grow closer. Getting her connected with a therapist at the church to start her healing process with her generalized anxiety disorder and looking to get her established with a long term therapist has been gratifying.
Coming to terms with my feelings on having a daughter with a disorder on the ADHD spectrum has been trying which leads me back to the point that becoming a parent is a learning process. I am willing to share my feelings, thoughts and experiences with you all.
Thanks for your company on this journey.